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Arkansas, depression, health, Life, marriage, Mental Health

Struggling

I’m going to be super honest and vulnerable for a minute here. Which is so unlike me. But I’ve been struggling pretty bad lately. And I’m hiding it. I’ve learned how to do that pretty well.

I have been suffering from some severe depression lately. I get so caught up in my thoughts and feelings. It’s almost debilitating.

You see, I did something horrible to my husband. I’m not going to go into detail, but I haven’t been the best wife. My lack of communication of how I feel made things worse. We both made major faults in our marriage. But mine were worse. And it almost ended. It’s true what they say, you don’t realize what you have till you’re about to lose it. You think you want something and then when it starts to happen, you realize you made a mistake. I almost lost my marriage and my family. And I hurt my husband whom I love so much.

In this process, I also lost my best friend of 23 years. She thinks I’m a horrible person. And I guess I am. But all I can do is learn from my mistakes and apologize. Which I have and am. But I do miss her. She understood me better than anyone.

But lately my depression has been really bad. There are times when I think that everyone would be better off if I was just gone. That I’m such a horrible person that I don’t deserve to have anything or anyone. I haven’t brought any kind of happiness to anyone. Just hurt. And before y’all freak out, no I’m not going to hurt myself.

I was seeing a counselor for awhile. I’m not sure how much that helped. I was diagnosed with ADHD and PTSD. However I don’t go anymore as I don’t have insurance since I quit my job to open my own business. But on days I saw her, I felt worse. I guess you are supposed to work through everything and then you’ll feel better. I hadn’t got to that point yet. I am seen at the VA now and they want me to see mental health to work through the PTSD. I don’t know. Maybe one day.

I don’t know the point of this post. I guess I’m just talking. But from here on out, I’m going to be better. A better person, a better wife, a better mom, and a better friend.

beauty, Hair Care, Monat, skin care

What is Monat?

It’s the best haircare and skincare products I’ve ever used. Literally. I cannot brag on this stuff more.

I tried it because a friend of mine used and was a Market Partner for Monat. So finally I said, ok I’ll try it. After just the first use, I was hooked. I couldn’t believe how great my hair looked and felt.

I loved it so much I decided to become a market partner too. I wish I had discovered this stuff sooner. It’s amazing. Literally in a month, my hair has grown almost 2 inches. It’s crazy.

So if you’ve ever been curious about Monat, here is some info on it. And today is the last au for amazing sales they are having. Shoot me a message if you want to learn more.

Why MONAT over other companies?

Our ingredients! A lot are exclusive to MONAT! Here are a few of our key ingredients!

🌱Rejuvaniqe is our blend of 13+ natural plant and essential oils rich in omega fatty acids, antioxidants, & nutrients that are highly compatible with the hair & skin.

🌱Capixyl is a peptide blend with red clover extract. It’s an emollient that helps to protect the scalp & create a rich environment for hair to grow. This is a very powerful ingredient for hair density.

🌱Procataline is formulated from a pea extract. It’s function is to create younger looking hair by protecting the strands from UV rays & environmental damage.

🌱Crodasorb also protects the hair from UV rays and is the primary ingredient we use to preserve your hair color. It will also keep your hair strong.

👑Our Rejuveniqe oil is our crown jewel & it’s infused in almost all out products!👑

▪️Rejuveniqe is a custom blend of 13+ pure botanical oils, including the exclusive ingredient, Abyssinian Oil.

▪️Abyssinian oil comes from the crambe abyssinian plant 🌱 native to the Mediterranean and East Africa- and currently the oil is produced on Prince Edward Island in Canada 🇨🇦 ⠀

▪️Abyssinian Oil has a unique molecular structure that is not found in any other naturally occurring oil. It has been shown to significantly improve skin’s complexion and hair’s luster through unique Omega 9️⃣ fatty acids. It also has a lower protein base, which means it gives the perfect amount of moisture, opposed to other oils with a high protein base that in time actually dry out the hair and make it brittle.

▪️Monat is committed to ensuring our Abyssinian growers are using sustainable farming practices in their daily operations. Monat also gives back a percentage of its profits to the farmers that grow and maintain our crops, in the spirit of gratitude for our planet 🙏🏼 🌍 ⠀

▪️It’s our crown jewel 💎 product for a reason. Dry scalp? Rejuveniqe. Oily scalp? Rejuveniqe. Damaged hair? Rejuveniqe. Dull, lifeless hair? Rejuveniqe. Sunburn? Cracked heels? Dry lips? Peeling cuticles? Yep- REJUVENIQE.

🖤Have you ever used an oil treatment in your hair? or would you try if you don’t use MONAT yet?

Do you love the science behind MONAT as much as I do!?🖤

Her are some before and afters of the hair care and skin care.

If you want to find out more, send me a message.

Arkansas, family

Mid-Life What???

I was talking over text with a friend, and I mentioned how I’ll be 40 next year. After we finished chatting I sat and thought about that. How is this possible? 40.

I literally feel like I just graduated High School. But that was 20 years ago. I don’t feel 40.

Then I was reading over notes from my doctor following a procedure I had done in October. He states in it, that per some tests I am entering menopause. This has me shook.

I remember when my husband and I started dating, it felt so good knowing that he was in his 30’s and I was in my 20’s. I was the cute young girlfriend. Now he’s about to be 50 and me 40. I’m no longer that cute super young girlfriend. Now I’m an old mom.

I know that age is just a number. And you are only as old as you feel. But still, hearing all of this is crazy. No wonder people have mid-life crisis.

Me and the husband when we first started dating. He was 32. I had just turned 22.

This is us now. He’s 49, I’m 39 with our two daughters who are 10 and 5.

Arkansas, beauty, MakeUp, skin care, subscription Box

November BoxyCharm

I received my November BoxyCharm. It’s ok. I’m not super thrilled with it. But here is what I got:

Dominique Cosmetics: Celestial Thunder Eye Shadow Palette. Retails for $35

The colors are so bright and vibrant. Plus I love the two glitter ones.

Juice Beauty: Stem Cellular Anti-Wrinkle Eye Treatment. Retails for $50.

Dose of Colors: Liquid Matte Lipstick. Retails for $18.

Vitamasques: Morning and Evening Mask Set. Retails for $12.

BoxyCharm: 2-Piece Brush Set. Retails for $35.

So that is what I received. It’s ok. But I have received a lot of matte lipstick, which I’m not a fan of, and eye shadow pallets. So I may need to go in and change my preferences.

What is BoxyCharm?

It is a monthly subscription box. For $25 a month and you get 4-5 full size products sent to you. I love it. If you want to try it, follow the link below.

https://www.boxycharm.com/refer/Shann-FSVWXSEN

Review

Review

So I received this product free to review. And I’m going to be honest with my review. I had my oldest daughter, she’s 9, try it. She hated it. She spit it out. I thought it was just because she’s picky. So I had my youngest, she’s 5, try it. She eats anything. Not picky at all. And she didn’t like it at all. She said it tasted bad and made her gag. So unfortunately, we will not be sharing this product with others.

I myself gave it a try before throwing it out, and even I as an adult did not like it. So sadly, we threw this out. If it came in a gummy, that probably would have been better.

*I received this product free for my review.*

Arkansas, arwx, storms, weather

2nd Largest Tornado in Northwest Arkansas

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted a blog. I’ve been so super busy. As some of you know, I recently quit my job and opened my own women’s clothing store. It’s a scary thing to do, diving into the unknown. But I really think it’s going to be amazing. As long as I put the work in.

But now on to what I really want to tell y’all. On Sunday, we had severe weather. Now normally, I’m very vigilant with storms. I usually stay weather alert and stay up watching Darby Bybee, Chief meteorologist on 40/29 news, live videos. But I was so exhausted, I just fell asleep. Around 12:15pm, I was woken by my phone flashing and the faint sound of tornado sirens. Crap, how could I have fallen asleep at that time. I hopped out of bed, woke up my husband, grabbed blankets and pillows, threw them in the tub; the girls bathroom is our safe space; grabbed my girls and took shelter. We don’t have a basement. I turned on Darby on FB and watched as he told us what was going on. I also text my girlfriend Kandie and Mother In Law.

Luckily we were ok. We weren’t in the path of the tornado. But the NWS in Little Rock confirm that Northwest Arkansas has two tornados touch down. One from Eastern Oklahoma to Siloam Springs. And the second one went from Siloam Springs, through Cave Springs, through Highfill, through Rogers, all the way till Avoca. And that tornado was about 1.5 miles wide.

Here is a map of the path of the tornado. I am the blue mark on the map. Close.

So needless to say, that was a scary situation. And the aftermath was sad and devastating. Not as bad as Joplin as this tornado was an EF-1 and Joplin was an EF-5. But still very sad.

And now we are supposed to get anywhere from 2-6 inches of rain in the early morning. So now everyone with roof damage will not have water damage as well.

I guess NWA just can’t catch a break yet.

**The tornado was just upgraded by the NWS to a EF-2 tornado.**